A Star Spangled Story

Last night I was invited to a dock party. One of the coolest parts about living in Chicago is 24 hour access to the lakefront and knowing people with boats….or knowing people who know people with boats, in my case. The party was exactly as you might expect: a wide spread of food, a keg or two and plenty of American glory as we all came together for a celebration of patriotism, a sense of pride and the possibility of someone to waste a little time with on the dock of the bay with. As the fireworks cascaded over Navy Pier I couldn't help but feel a swell of pride. National anthems, wedding vows and K Jewelers commercials tend to do this to me on a regular basis, but I felt more that night. There was understood companionship between the bright flash of sky and the proud silent city standing behind it. The great Chicago skyline looked on as bursts of color exploded and fell to the still and cool water below it. I thought for a moment, a blurring of my past lives: from feathers and rhinestones, to murder in the Midwest. My life has been a greater voyage than many would fear to tread, and as though it were a burst from the barge of my heartstrings I was filled with a sense of gratitude for the time, place and wonder that is life for all of us
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I have found my home in Chicago for over a year now, and while days often pass slowly, seeming to change very little from week to week, we commemorate each holiday by commemorating what we did the year before. Last year, I was invited to a BBQ at a friends house filled with relatively new faces, new friends, a story that was not yet unfolded. The You Tube sensation “Jessica’s Affirmations” was sweeping facebook. I pulled it up on my phone and asked if anyone had seen it. We all had a chuckle as we watched an adorable little girl no more than 5 stare at herself in the mirror and enthusiastically list all of the things she loved about her life. It wasn’t long until we, fueled by celebration, creativity and Bud Light , decided to create our own video parodies of what we were grateful for. Affirmations ranged from “I love my family” to “I love that I have little boobs” Never could I have imagined that this year I would actually be living at that very same house, with very dear friends and writing new pages of the story every day.

As I sat in that backyard tonight with those friends we talked about last year. We talked about years to come and growing old in a life long blossoming friendship. My friend Justin reminded me that to be an American isn’t just about money, or success or the striving for the American dream but about having the choice to. True freedom is being able to choose the life we make for ourselves. We are free to choose: who to love, where to work, what friends to keep, what decisions to make, what to eat for lunch, what shoes to buy, and even what city to live in.
A year ago I chose to make Chicago my home, to start a new chapter here and to allow fate to finish the novel, because unlike a short but brilliant display of gold or silver sparkle against a black sky, the choices we make everyday influence lasting and vibrant memories.
I surly don’t have everything I could dream of. I often feel rushed, anxious or behind in terms of my future. So many of us are looking for the perfect job, mate, apartment… sandwich… but when you really stop to think about it, most people I know are all living the American Dream because we have been given the chance to do so, and I’m certain that if we can fill ourselves with enough gratitude for what we have we can overcome or accomplish most things. Maybe this Jessica needs to be reminded of what that little Jessica said “I can do anything”, and being given the opportunity to do so, sounds like pure patriotism to me.